Combat

Now hear this: Moms of multiples are not deaf.

We may be exhausted and jacked up on the 'Bux but we're definitely not deaf. All too often complete strangers freely give commentary on the "twin" thing.

OUT LOUD.

This irks us. Sometimes these comments are directed *at* us (sometimes even with a smile, bless their hearts), but most often are muttered just within hearing distance. Nice. Thanks.

Favorites:
Double Trouble!
Boy, you sure have you're hands full!
Better you than me!

And the fertility drug references are a scream:
Are they natural?
Did you have to go to a doctor for those?
Did you have trouble having babies?
Are they *real*? (I swear that someone actually asked me this where I answered, "No, they're robots! You should git you some!")

and finally (drum roll, please...):

Did you need help having your babies? (WHAT?!?!?!)

Hellllooooooooo? We can HEAR you.

I used to get defensive but now I shoot back with some choice phrases of my own. Feel free to try these on your unsuspecting clueless commentators. Maybe you'll spare another twin mom from hearing the same sooo-not-funny schtick.

I find a perfectly sub-texted "Really?" goes a long way. Like, "Really?" with the subtext tone of, "Do you *really* want to tangle with me today? I've already changed 8 diapers this morning and I may still have poop on me somewhere." Seriously. Pair that with a hard but earnest stare and you have a winning combo for shutting down the clueless.

Other stuff that works:
Comment - "You sure have your hands full!"
Response - "Better full than empty!" (O.k., it's corny, but it works.)

Comment - "Did you have trouble having babies?"
Response - "Are you offering to be a surrogate? Super!"

Comment - "Are they natural?"
Response - "Do I know you?" (Wait for it.. The answer is always "no".) "Then why would you ask such a personal question?" (This always shuts them up. And usually results in them skittering away. Skittering. Fun to watch.)

Be sure to SMILE lots.

I know that most of these are snarrrrky but, hey, let's face it, wouldn't a better comment to a twin mom be, "You are doing great!. Keep up the good work!" Or maybe even, "Your kids are lucky to have such a caring mom." Just some suggestions. Let's get the word out. Stop the clueless comments, people. We need kudos not rudeness.

Stay tuned on ways to answer the douzy, "How sweet.. You have boy/girl twins... ARE THEY IDENTICAL?"

Oh dear...

What are your favorite twin mom comebacks? What gets the best/most positive/most shocking response? Share here - we need some ammo for the arsenal!